Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
is that a dick in a sweater?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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