I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
