Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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