Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
