it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Damn victory sex feels great
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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