I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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