What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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