So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize