Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
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