seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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