Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
