Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
i just google imaged poop.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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