I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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