worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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