i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
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