IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
