So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.