In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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