Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
