Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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