Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Randomize
