Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
