Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize