so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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