Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
