i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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