we should wear snuggies to the strip club
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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