so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
