Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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