clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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