My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
