we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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