I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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