dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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