You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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