thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
