just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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