Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Randomize
