Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
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He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
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If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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