Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
