Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Randomize
