before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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