I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
