i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
