By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize