bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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