YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
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Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
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Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂