Texts From Last Night

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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture

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  (913): I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture http://tfl.nu/ttvt
  Replies (46) Good night (673) Bad night (2960)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.

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  (402): P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide. http://tfl.nu/s8ub
  Replies (5) Good night (3852) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical

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  (612): I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical http://tfl.nu/u7u5
  Replies (18) Good night (9587) Bad night (852)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.

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  (917): I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear. http://tfl.nu/517j
  Replies (9) Good night (1429) Bad night (4480)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.

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  (647): Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday. http://tfl.nu/6zuu
  Replies (3) Good night (2093) Bad night (705)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.

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  (540): I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that. http://tfl.nu/0566
  Replies (10) Good night (1697) Bad night (710)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.

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  (260): Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide. http://tfl.nu/8iit
  Replies (4) Good night (679) Bad night (1910)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  no you're not allowed back

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night

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  (509): no you're not allowed back (412): come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night http://tfl.nu/ng3d
  Replies (4) Good night (1631) Bad night (596)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live

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  (954): And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live http://tfl.nu/94h1
  Replies (3) Good night (771) Bad night (698)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.

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  (817): He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before. http://tfl.nu/79xu
  Replies (4) Good night (1046) Bad night (384)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.

  (912): View more from Georgia

  I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision

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  (404): i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away. (912): I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision http://tfl.nu/a7l8
  Replies (5) Good night (1203) Bad night (381)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight

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  (717): But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight http://tfl.nu/x4t9
  Replies (2) Good night (685) Bad night (242)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.

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  (978): If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win. (508): And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them. http://tfl.nu/dotb
  Replies (5) Good night (565) Bad night (301)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.

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  (408): Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth. http://tfl.nu/q2nw
  Replies (5) Good night (1037) Bad night (421)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?

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  (410): Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek? http://tfl.nu/uirj
  Replies (3) Good night (316) Bad night (467)

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