that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
