...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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