I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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