it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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