Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy sore nipples Batman
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize